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The quest,  

 the encounter

 « The illusion of love is that it is encountered,
while love is learned. »

[ Saint-Exupéry ]

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The quest  
The seduction
The exhilarating illusion of loving
The sexual attraction

The approach

The commitment

We are saturated with false truths about love. Hence the repeated "errors" and unstable couples. The "soul mate" is not waiting for us somewhere. The ideal woman or man cannot be "found"; Happiness for two depends above all on inner construction.

 « Love, the illusion is that it is encountered, while love is learned. And he is mistaken who wanders in life in order to be conquered, knowing by short fevers the taste of the tumult of the heart and dreaming of meeting the great fever which will set him ablaze for life. »
[ Saint-Exupéry ]



Love is reflected in a thousand faces,
but running from one to another, we lose it.

___

The quest

The seduction
The exhilarating illusion of loving
The sexual attraction

 The seduction

 « Love is not just about attraction. It is first of all the meeting of two souls. »
 [ "Annaëlle Chimoni's book" ]

 « If your love has no hope of being received, you must keep it quiet. If it becomes vain supplication as a reward for your fidelity, and it is not in your strength of soul to be silent, then, if there is a doctor, get yourself cured. For we must not confuse love with the slavery of the heart. The love that prays is beautiful, but the love that begs is of a valet. »
[ Saint-Exupéry ]

 « Those who seek to please are mistaken. And to please, they become malleable and ductile. And respond in advance to desires. And betrays in everything in order to be as we wish. But what have I to do with these jellyfish which have neither bone nor form? I vomit them up and return them to their nebulae: come and see me when you are built.

 Thus women themselves get tired of who loves them when that one, to show his love, agrees to be an echo and a mirror, because no one needs his own image. But I need you who are built as a fortress with your core that I meet. Sit down because you exist. »
[ Saint-Exupéry ]

 « Son of man, stand on your feet, and I will speak to you. »
(Ezekiel 1.26)

 The exhilarating illusion of loving

 « And I know it, I who have been caught in the trap of creatures for so long, knowing that this one that was formed in some foreign land and oiled with the perfection of automatons, it would be possible for me to seize it .
 And I called this vertigo love. And it seemed to me that I would die of thirst if I did not know how to obtain it.
 The bonfires in my town were burning to celebrate love. And I alone, in my terrible desert, watched her sleep.
 "I got the wrong prey, I got the wrong run. She was running away so fast and I stopped her to grab hold of her… And once caught, she was no more…"

 But I also understood my mistake. I was running to run, and I had been crazy like the one who filled his jug and locked it in his cupboard because he liked the song of the fountains…. »
[ Saint-Exupéry ]

 « Your mental is not your consciousness. He is the generator of your thoughts. It is he who gives the injunction to love or not to love, with the help of a cohort of pre-established arguments. »
(D. Meurois and A. Givaudan, 'Par l’esprit du Soleil')magnifying glassAuthorContributions by Anne Givaudan on the theme of:

The WAY , LOVE , LIFE , HEALTH or DEATH

 « Certainly, when I was young, I walked up and down on my terrace because of some runaway slave where I read my cure. I would have raised armies to reconquer it. And to possess her I would have thrown provinces at her feet, but God is my witness that I did not confuse the meaning of things and never qualified love, even if it involved my life, this looking for my prey. »
[ Saint-Exupéry ]

 The sexual attraction

 « The sexual instinct, a mechanism of reproduction, is endowed with a bait, pleasure, without which the species would disappear. Affinities are then grafted which can evolve into deep affection. Pleasure is an open door to an expression of Love.
 On the contrary, if this pleasure is sought for its own sake, it leads to selfishness. »
[ "To those who seek" ]

 « The union of certain couples too often depends, essentially, on a strong and immediate sexual attraction. This attraction where desire dominates develops passion. Like anger, hatred or the thirst for revenge, these impulses can lead to sinking into madness. Devoured by these extremes it is inevitable that this type of union will quickly break down.

 When our desire for the loved one disappears, then the way we look at him changes. This change sometimes happens so suddenly that we are amazed. Desire hitherto concealed the real nature of the other and of the relationship, and rested only on a reciprocal misunderstanding. »
[ Dalai Lama ]

 « Sex is joy, but many of you have made sex anything but joy.

 Sex is sacred too, but joy and the sacred are intertwined (in fact both are the same thing), although you often think otherwise. »
[Inspired message to Neale Walsch]

 « The path of desire can cross certain reflections of love. Through this, man escapes pure chance and rubs shoulders with the Spirit. »
[ "To those who seek" ]

Floating picture « Ladies, a piece of advice. If you're looking for a handsome, wealthy, smart guy... get three! » (Coluche)

HOME > The quest  
The seduction
The exhilarating illusion of loving
The sexual attraction
> The approach> The commitment

The approach, the vertigo

_ _

  « Anything you do, do it with your whole being. If you're only indulging in sex from your lower chakra, you're missing out on the most glorious part of the experience by far. But if you are affectionate towards your partner, you live a summit experience. When you have raised the vital energy to your higher centers, you may or may not choose to have a sexual experience. You will not violate any cosmic law of holiness. And it will not lower you to the level of the root chakra, unless you disconnect from the top. »
[Inspired message to Neale Walsch]

 The fascination

 « Fascination can never last. It leads to suffering and then dies... until next time.
 Love grows and grows richer all the time. Spouses, says the Bible, "are no longer but one soul and one flesh." The marital relationship is the most complete and the richest. A wife should be for her husband a mistress, a sister, a friend, a mother, an associate, a judge. The spouse, a lover, a brother, a father, a friend, an associate, a judge.
 If each has projected onto the other the personification of his unconscious mode or a particular image of a man or a woman, there can be fascination, marvelous fascination or tragic fascination, but not love.
 Love begins with knowing the other, through knowing oneself.To love, one must be.
 Otherwise marriage is only the coupling of two egoisms or two fascinations. »
[ Arnaud Desjardins, 'The paths of wisdom' ]

 « The other is the privileged object on which we project our dreams of a perfect and ideal life, then we condemn it because it is, like us, simply human. We hate him for not being able to live up to our expectations, because he cannot mend the wounds of childhood.
 The other is the catalyst of our emotions, our fantasies, the mirror of our neuroses, the revealer of our shortcomings.

 The incessant quest for romantic love can be a brake on our evolution, on our spiritual development. This idealization of Love corresponds to a need that hides the reality and the nature of the affection we have for each other. Based on a fantasy, it can be extremely frustrating.

 The Love that grows between two beings who respect each other mutually is knowledge. This genuine affection is free from expectation. »
[ Dalai Lama ]


HOME > The quest  
The seduction
The exhilarating illusion of loving
The sexual attraction
> The approach > The commitment

Leaving on good foundations
is the guarantee of a successful meeting.

The commitment


___

  « Make sure you are in a relationship for the right reasons – that is, in relation to the higher purpose you have set for yourself. Most people still come into a relationship for the wrong reasons – to end to their loneliness, to fill a void, to heal a past relationship, to relieve boredom.

 None of these reasons work, and unless there is a drastic change along the way, the relationship will not change.

 For most people, love is a response to the fulfillment of needs.

 You need this, the other needs that, and each sees in the other a chance to meet their own needs. It is then a kind of exchange. I will give you what I have if you give me what you have. In this transaction you are not telling the truth. You don't say, “I trade you a lot. You say, "I love you very much," and that's the beginning of disappointment.

 Fall in love with as many people as you want. But if you want to form a permanent relationship with someone, you better think about it a little more. Start by making sure you and your partner agree on the goal. Makes the wish that your relationship is an opportunity to grow, to elevate your life's potential.

 There will be difficult times. Don't try to avoid them. In these times, try very hard not to see your partner as your enemy or an adversary.

People tend to see in them what we see in them. The grander our vision, the greater their will to reach and show the part of themselves that we have shown them.

 Thus, in genuinely happy relationships, one gives the other permission to “let go” of any false idea of ​​himself. »
[Inspired message to Neale Walsch]

 « The purpose of a relationship is to decide which part of yourself you would like to see 'emerge,' rather than which part of someone else you can possess.

 It is very romantic to say that you were “nothing” before the arrival of this extraordinary being, but it is not true. Also, it puts incredible pressure on that being to be all kinds of things that it is not.

 Not wanting to “disappoint” you, the other tries very hard to be and do all of this, until he can't take it anymore. He can no longer complete the image you have of him. He can no longer fulfill the roles to which he was assigned. Resentment mounts. Anger follows.

 Eventually, in order to save himself (and the relationship), this extraordinary being begins to take back his true self and act more according to Who He Really Is. It's around this time that you say he “really changed”.

 It is very romantic to say that now that your extraordinary being has entered your life, you feel complete. But the purpose of the relationship is not to have someone else who could complete you, but to have someone else to share your completeness with.

 This is the paradox of all human relationships: You don't need anyone in particular to truly experience Who You Are.
☆ Excerpt from the page: "Taking-back-control" :

Every being is connected to their inner Self,
which is connected to God.

 Our inner being

 « In you there are two characters, one terrestrial, stuck to matter, mired in its heaviness, and the other celestial, letting itself be carried by the light. The moment you conceive your two poles, you become greedy for unity and begin your quest for purity. But that's also where the trouble begins! In the innocence of unconsciousness you found a certain tranquility, operating in the same patterns for generations, fit to taste the pleasures of the flesh.
 However, as soon as your consciousness opens to greater lucidity, your thirst for clarity comes up against the shadows.
 In the grip of an existential despair, your mind then plays monumental tricks on you. You become the prey of grief, terrible doubts, loneliness and your impatience.
 We are with you more than ever in these wanderings. Because then we recognize in you the flame, the inner fire.

 Then begins an interior dialogue between your soul, which has already recognized us, and us who are your servants, your companions on the way. At your side, ready to support you in the difficult passages, smiling at your stammerings as a child of light.

 In your heart of hearts, ego of earth and soul of light manifest themselves to each other and show themselves in turn. There is no point in adjusting them with a master's hand, there is no point in wishing for their fruitful friendship. Their role is not to oust each other. Thus you grow, by making in you the union of your part of incarnated man and your part of brilliance of light. It is there, in the balanced axis between these two aspects of yourself, that you touch that you touch the new dimension that allows you to Over-Live (among earthly torments). Then your personality of light irrigates your being incarnated in matter for a happy birth: that of the new Man in you, an incarnated reflection of the Father Creator. »
[ Brigitte Quéro, "Spiritual Messages"]
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, but… without someone else, you are nothing.

 This is both the mystery and the joy of the human experience. This requires a deep understanding within this paradox. When you begin your personal relationships, you are filled with anticipation, with an open heart and a joyful soul. Between the ages of 40 and 60 (often long before that), you gave up on your biggest dream, and settled for your lowest expectation, or nothing at all.

The problem is so fundamental, so simple and yet so misunderstood that it is tragic: it would be enough for each person in a relationship to be concerned, not with the other, but only with Self.
☆ Excerpt from the page: "Taking-back-control" :

Every being is connected to their inner Self,
which is connected to God.

 Our inner being

The Texts agree on one essential point: deep within us, our eternal being slumbers; the one who came to incarnate on Earth, the time of a lifetime; who sometimes gives us advice. This marvelous part of ourselves binds us to other men and to God, in the same way that in the soil all the roots of all plants join in mother earth.

_ _

 « In you there are two characters, one terrestrial, stuck to matter, mired in its heaviness, and the other celestial, letting itself be carried by the light. The moment you conceive your two poles, you become greedy for unity and begin your quest for purity. But that's also where the trouble begins! In the innocence of unconsciousness you found a certain tranquility, operating in the same patterns for generations, fit to taste the pleasures of the flesh.
 However, as soon as your consciousness opens to greater lucidity, your thirst for clarity comes up against the shadows.
 In the grip of an existential despair, your mind then plays monumental tricks on you. You become the prey of grief, terrible doubts, loneliness and your impatience.
 We are with you more than ever in these wanderings. Because then we recognize in you the flame, the inner fire.

 Then begins an interior dialogue between your soul, which has already recognized us, and us who are your servants, your companions on the way. At your side, ready to support you in the difficult passages, smiling at your stammerings as a child of light.

 In your heart of hearts, ego of earth and soul of light manifest themselves to each other and show themselves in turn. There is no point in adjusting them with a master's hand, there is no point in wishing for their fruitful friendship. Their role is not to oust each other. Thus you grow, by making in you the union of your part of incarnated man and your part of brilliance of light. It is there, in the balanced axis between these two aspects of yourself, that you touch that you touch the new dimension that allows you to Over-Live (among earthly torments). Then your personality of light irrigates your being incarnated in matter for a happy birth: that of the new Man in you, an incarnated reflection of the Father Creator. »
[ Brigitte Quéro, "Spiritual Messages"]
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[Inspired message to Neale Walsch]

This exhortation to concern oneself first with one's inner elevation is very important, because only a constructed person can truly love.

  "To love, one must be" reminds Arnaud Desjardins.

  ☞   Work first on our own elevation